The Truth Hurts

I’ve been overwhelmed by information lately. Information about my son’ s learning issues. I was undecided about sharing our new diagnosis with the world, but this blog is based on truth and helping others so here goes.

Let me preface this by saying that my son and daughter are adopted. We brought them home from Russia 10 years ago when they were 3.5 and 2 years old. They are now 13 and 12. They are a joy to us and we love our family very much. We are thankful that we were lucky enough to find each other.

My son just received a diagnosis of “Fetal Alcohol Effect“. That is a less obvious form of “Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder“. It results in wide ranging damage to the brain’s “executive functioning”. Children with this disorder have normal intelligence but face struggles with many things. Common problems are:

Higher mathematics
Abstract concepts
Working memory
Organization
Visual-Auditory learning
Time and money concepts
ADD/ ADHD

We always suspected this might be an issue but we were unaware of the wide-ranging nature of my son’s problems. We are spending time adjusting his curriculum and modifying the way we interact with him. This is a very helpful diagnosis because along with it came suggestions for strategies to make life easier for all of us. At the same time it has been a lot to take in and it’s certainly not something we were happy to hear. It takes time to digest this knowledge and settle our emotions.

We know now that our daughter has also been affected and are making arrangements to have her tested. She is having problems with her working memory and it’s showing up in her school work. 

I’ll be posting a lot more about this as we go along. We are developing strategies to make learning easier for our son, and life better for us as a family.  I am anxious to share what we discover.

New York State Board of Regents to Consider Policy Change on IEP Diploma

I’d love to cut and paste this article but copyright makes me think twice. The Regents have realized that an IEP diploma is not being given out as they intended and that they misunderstood what an IEP was all about.

In my opinion they are a bunch of out-of-touch bureaucrats who justify their existence by constantly changing the regulations. They have no idea what is really going on at the school level. ANYWAY – this is a step in the right direction.  Lets hope they don’t just make it more ridiculously complicated.

Today I am Angry

Perhaps I am too angry to be posting, but this is my reality and quite possibly yours too. Here is a link to Advocates for Children, which provides more information on the subject to follow.

In New York State we have the “Regents Diploma”. You must pass a series of exams to graduate high school with this diploma.

My son was on track for an “IEP diploma”. This type of diploma is NOT satisfactory for entrance to college. It is simply an indication that the child has met the goals on his or her IEP and has been passed along through 12 years of schooling. I managed to send him through six years of school without anyone informing me of the significance of this difference. What an outrage! My child has been judged and found wanting by the educational establishment. They’ve judged him incapable of going on to university. He needs to go to a life-skills transition program according to the standardistas. You know, a teacher once told my mother that I’d never go to college, never be a success. I am now a university graduate and business owner. I always thought that letting my child be labeled would enable him to receive the help he needs. Instead that label has designated him a failure before he even begins.

I AM NOT GOING TO LET THIS HAPPEN. YOU SHOULD NOT LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOUR CHILD.

My son is a bright individual who can and will overcome his learning differences. He is not mentally challenged, he is not on the autism spectrum, he does not have some serious diagnosis, he is learning differently. BIG DIFFERENCE. I know that he can and will be a success, that he can go to college, perhaps with some assistive technology. For New York State to tell me differently is an affront.

I don’t think I’m going to stop homeschooling anytime soon. Of course in NYS that means he’ll receive a GED. But colleges accept homeschooled students. It looks like I’m in this for the long run.